Picking Up the Broken Pieces & How to Heal | Ep. 10

Welcome to The Noble Marriage, where Travis and Adelle bring real, raw, and relatable conversations about life and marriage. In Episode 10, we dive deep into the pervasive issue of mental health conditions, specifically focusing on Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). This episode provides vital insights and practical tools for healing, and we highly recommend watching the bonus episode released before this one for additional context and a raw look into recent personal struggles.

Travis and Adelle kick off with a brief gratitude exchange, highlighting the importance of practicing gratitude daily. They share personal moments of appreciation – Travis for Adelle's "tasty toast" and service, and Adelle for Travis's remarkable patience and easygoing nature during a challenging vacation, attributing it to God's peace and self-control. They briefly recap Episode 9, which focused on how to process emotions after trauma, emphasizing that everyone experiences trauma, whether big or small. They stress that unaddressed emotions can become "trapped," leading to mental health conditions.

Today's episode connects the dots: when emotions from trauma are not processed effectively, it can lead to mental health conditions like PTSD. Travis clarifies that he's sharing his personal experience with PTSD, not comparing it to anyone else's, but hopes his story and the tools shared will bring healing and answers to listeners.

Travis reads an excerpt from their upcoming book, "Secrets Make Me Sick," detailing how his journey with PTSD began. He shares that about a year into his law enforcement career (around age 23-24), he started having severe nightmares and sleeplessness due to stuffing emotions from traumatic incidents. He resorted to alcohol to induce sleep, a behavior that continued for years, despite the negative effects on sleep quality and overall well-being. Travis reiterates the powerful "backpack full of poo" analogy from Episode 9, illustrating how he continued to stuff emotions, hoping they wouldn't "explode." He felt isolated, believing no one would understand, and feared appearing weak. Adelle reflects on how Travis appeared to "have it all together" on the outside, a "clean cup" masking inner turmoil, which made his later decline shocking. Travis acknowledges this facade, noting he cultivated a public image while internally struggling with immense pain.

Travis recounts a pivotal incident that became the catalyst for his PTSD: the death by suicide of a young Black man in police custody during a drug arrest. This tragedy ignited significant racial tension in the community. Despite Travis's innocence and eventual clearance by multiple independent agencies, his name was released to the media. He faced public accusation of murder, threats, and even a shooting at his home, leading to intense paranoia and fear. They discuss the profound impact this event had, creating years of chaos and fear, including a 7-year civil lawsuit. Travis acknowledges the deep heaviness and loss of potential in the young man's life.

Travis details the red flags and symptoms he experienced as PTSD developed: paranoia, heightened tension, increased aggression, agitation, rage, depression, self-isolation, neglecting physical fitness, and acting out (increased alcohol use, pornography, and self-pleasure to numb the pain). They clarify that PTSD is not exclusive to military or police personnel; it can stem from a wide range of experiences, including natural disasters, serious accidents, medical trauma, witnessing violence, bullying, domestic violence, relationship betrayal, sexual assault, childhood neglect, and the loss of a loved one. They mention various types of PTSD, including "uncomplicated PTSD" from a single traumatic event. Adelle emphasizes how the enemy leverages PTSD to keep individuals "stuck in the past" with "repeated thought patterns and behaviors," preventing healing. Travis admits he felt hopeless during this time and couldn't "see a way out." They encourage listeners to "borrow hope" if they feel hopeless, recalling a friend who offered Travis hope in his darkest hour.

They advocate for starting with "1% changes" to build healthy habits on the pathway to healing from PTSD. This includes prioritizing physical health through balanced nutrition, adequate sleep, and exercise, and practicing relaxation techniques like deep breathing (such as box breathing) to lower anxiety. Spiritual practices are also key, such as meditating on God's Word (Travis mentions Psalm 23). They stress the importance of connection and support, counteracting isolation by connecting with loved ones, speaking openly about struggles, and seeking professional help from trusted therapists or mental health coaches (like themselves). Realigning identity with being a beloved child of God (Genesis 1:26-28, Genesis 5:1) and understanding one's purpose to love God, self, and others, differentiating it from ever-changing "assignments" (jobs, roles), is also crucial. They emphasize the crucial role of forgiveness (of self, others, or even God) in releasing bitterness, resentment, and blockages to healing. They highlight effective therapeutic modalities such as EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing), Brainspotting, and Cognitive Processing Therapy (CPT). They also mention MDMA-assisted therapy (as discussed in another interview with a friend), an experimental treatment showing promise for severe trauma. Finally, they acknowledge that medication, guided by a listening doctor, can also be a valuable part of a holistic healing plan, encouraging prayer for wisdom in this area.

If you or someone you know is struggling with PTSD or mental health conditions, we want to encourage you to get the help you need and deserve. There is hope, and a fulfilling life is possible. What steps can you take today to begin your healing journey? For more information and resources on healing from trauma and PTSD, please visit our website and check out our "Becoming Whole and Complete" program, specifically designed to help you find healing from past trauma: https://programs.thenoblemarriage.com/offers/Sp2C2WjG/checkout