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"I Can't Forgive Yet": Answering Your Hardest Questions on Trust and Letting Go | BONUS

Season #2

 

Welcome to our live bonus episode where we dive into the powerful questions and vulnerable comments from our Season Two finale (Episodes 11 & 12). We're excited to engage with the community and offer support, encouragement, and hope for those walking through marital crisis and betrayal. We discuss the God-sized hole as the "why" behind all destructive behavior, the power of forgiveness and letting go of crushing burdens, and the difference between trust and forgiveness. Plus, we give away a gift to everyone who engages in the chat!

 

We are excited for what's next on The Noble Marriage channel!

  • Bonus Interview (June 4th): "He Left Divorce Papers Signed But God Never Fails." A miraculous story of a husband's "Road to Damascus" experience when the enemy had stolen his heart, and God intervened to restore his marriage. Don't miss this powerful testament to God's faithfulness!

  • Bonus Interview (June 11th): A conversation with Kate Conwell (Journey Beyond Betrayal) about her personal story of hope and how she now supports betrayed women through community and ministry.

  • Season 3 (Coming Soon): "Six Layers of Deception." This highly anticipated 7-episode season is for deep healing. We will identify the six layers of deception the enemy uses, connecting them to spiritual warfare, and equipping you with the knowledge and authority through Christ to achieve freedom.

 

Community Q&A and Encouragement 

Finding Hope in the Waiting

  • Comment from Ginger Ingram: Shared her struggle after 34 months of separation, still holding onto God's promise of restoration. She has forgiven her husband and apologized for her own faults.

    • Encouragement: We pray for Ginger to continue seeking the Holy Spirit for a fresh outlook, leaning into Matthew 6:33 ("Seek ye first the kingdom of God..."). Her ability to forgive an unrepentant spouse is humble and Christ-like. We highly recommend our "Prayer for the Unrepentant Spouse" video resource.

  • Comment from Greg Rising: Finds hope in knowing that shocking betrayal actions, like those seen on TV, are common absurdities by those blinded by sin.

    • Encouragement: This perspective is mirrored throughout the Bible—humanity's failures followed by God's redemption. We defeat the enemy by our testimony (Revelation 12:11) because sharing our story of Jesus's transformation replaces fear with faith.

Getting Alignment with God and Brotherhood

  • Question from Daryl Lang: Did you find it hard to get your alignment right with God first before your healing started in your marriage?

    • Travis's Answer: Yes, the process of sanctification is ongoing. His biggest hurdle was truly believing his identity in Christ—that he is made in God's image, adopted into sonship, and a friend of Jesus. Surrounding himself with a brotherhood of godly men who speak truth, grace, and accountability is essential (Proverbs 27:17 - "Iron sharpens iron").

    • Leadership: As the male leader of the home, his first ministry is his family. When a husband takes a standfor what the family needs (like going to church), the family is far more likely to follow 

Encouraging a Husband to Seek Accountability

  • Question from Colleen Wall: How did you get your husband to hang around with other men who he can be accountable to?

    • Answer: You cannot get your husband to do anything; control will only breed resistance. Instead, pray and encourage. Acknowledge the positive difference you see when he is around godly men ("I really like who you are when you hang around Joe").

    • Tips:

      • Suggest joining a couple's small group first, which provides a safe "dip your toes in the water" environment.

      • Emphasize the concept of Vulnerability-Based Trust: when one person (like a man in a safe group) shares vulnerably, it prompts others to lower their walls, building trust.

      • Our Betrayal Group Coaching is a low-cost, safe option where men can listen to others share and eventually feel comfortable enough to open up.

The Freedom of Forgiveness

  • Comment from Nicole Jones: Announced she officially forgave her husband for the betrayal and felt "freedom, peace, and a weight lifted off my shoulders." She surrendered it all while sitting in her car listening to worship music.

    • Adelle's Response: Confirmed she had a similar, powerful experience of letting go of the crushing burden of unforgiveness in the car. Speaking the decision to forgive out loud is powerful because the enemy cannot hear your thoughts, but he can hear your words, and it declares that he is losing the battle.

    • Travis's Response: Adelle's forgiveness was a human representation of Jesus's forgiveness, which helped him accept God's forgiveness for himself and release his own self-condemnation.

Forgiveness vs. Trust 

  • Comment from George Rodriguez (Betrayed Husband): I have given a level of forgiveness while still wanting to keep my walls up to not forgive fully, to not be hurt again.

    • Answer: Look at the definition of forgiveness—it is a choice for your healing. What you are describing is a lack of trust. You can have full forgiveness and no trust at the same time. Trust must be earned by your spouse's consistent actions, while forgiveness is a gift you choose to give yourself.

 

Rebuilding Trust

  • Question from Deborah: What were some concrete ways that Travis rebuilt trust?

    • Travis's Answer: Rebuilding trust requires time, effort, energy, and a humble, open, transparent heart. It requires the betrayer to become a person of integrity, where their words and actions consistently line upwith who they are committed to being.

 

Need support walking through betrayal? Learn more about how this program can help! https://programs.thenoblemarriage.com/offers/oHCqLSJr/checkout

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